Free Mom Hugs group aids abandoned LGBTQ youth

A new national nonprofit with a Michigan chapter seeks to provide parental, social and physical support for LGBTQ youth struggling to find acceptance in family and social spheres. 

Free Mom Hugs was founded in Oklahoma in 2016. Since then, it expanded to over 10 states. 

A hard look at the composition of homeless youth in the U.S. sees a stark picture of what it means to be LGBTQ in this country. 

UCLA published its findings on homeless LGBTQ youth in the U.S. in 2015. What it found was despite self-identifying LGBTQ youth accounting for only 5% of the U.S. population, between 20 to 40% of all homeless youth in the U.S. identify as LGBTQ. 

The large discrepancy is theorized by the study to be the result of “throwaway” or abandoned youth exiled by both parents and community for orientation and gender identity. 

Furthermore, with this state of isolation, it is equally important to note the rate of LGBTQ youth suicides. According to a study by The Trevor Project, a suicide and crisis intervention mental health resource for the LGBTQ community under 25 years old, LGBTQ youth are five times more likely to attempt suicide than their straight, cisgendered peers.   

The Michigan chapter of Free Mom Hugs started in January 2019. Its founder Vicki Larson of Grand Rapids, wanted to spearhead the movement in Michigan. 

“While there is certainly more acceptance, there is still not as much as there should be,” Larson said. 

For its first Pride week, Free Mom Hugs of Michigan will host events in Grand Rapids, Kalamazoo, Lansing and Detroit. Hundreds of moms have already signed up to pledge their support across the state, according to Larson. 

“With some of them, you can feel their desperation when you hold these kids,” she added. “They just need to know they are accepted and loved for who they are.”

LGBTQ youth face particular challenges in rural communities, unaware of available LGBTQ resources and greater LGBTQ community they belong to. 

“This organization is necessary for Michigan,” Larson said. “I’ve met kids who were gay and thrown out of the house immediately.” 

The group isn’t exclusive to just moms either. Dads can join too. 

Lansing program coordinator Charlene Victoria said LGBTQ equality has always been a big issue to her. 

“Growing up, my uncle was gay and always with our uncle Rich. I didn’t know any different. Doug loved Rich and that was that,” Victoria said. “When I grew up and found out people had an issue with this and there are people who are against this blew my mind.”

Victoria said she struggled to conceive as a mother, and it put parents who abandon their children for being LGBTQ in a different perspective. 

“I couldn’t imagine not loving my kids regardless of who they love or what gender they are,” Victoria added.   

Over a dozen Lansing moms thus far have volunteered to be posted at different stops along the Pride Parade for free hugs. There will also be a vendor booth handing out free water. 

“Not only being hugged, but I think being heard is very important,” Victoria said. “It can make them realize they are not alone. It is crucial as a human being to realize you are not alone and not feel like you are the only one.”   

There is no deadline to sign up for Free Mom Hugs for Lansing Pride. 

“This is simply about love with no agenda involved. It is making sure kids know they are loved and exactly that,” Larson said.   

(If interested, donations can be made and sign up sheets can be found at www.freemomhugs.org)