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Wednesday, May 1,2013

Advice Goddess

Smells like libertine spirit & random acts of silence

by Amy Alkon
Q: I got involved with my co-host on my Web show — a woman in an "open relationship" with her live-in boyfriend of two years. Things were light and fun between us until we developed actual feelings for each other and he got jealous and she became guilty and torn.
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Wednesday, April 24,2013

Advice Goddess

In sickness and in stealth & belittle Miss Sunshine

by Amy Alkon
Q: This woman and I were involved 13 years ago, before I met my wife, but she was married then. She got divorced and moved away. We reconnected recently on Facebook, and I discovered she's now only 20 miles away. I told her I'm happily married and I've never cheated on my wife, but I would risk everything for her and want to meet her for an intimate encounter.
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Wednesday, April 17,2013

Advice Goddess

Fry, fry again & to halve and halve not

by Amy Alkon
Q: I walked into my apartment and, to my horror, thought my boyfriend had been electrocuted. He was sprawled on the kitchen floor by an open electrical outlet with wires sticking out. There was a screwdriver near him, and the skin on his arm and hand was discolored. I ran over and started crying and shaking him. He started laughing and yelled, "April fools!"
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Wednesday, April 10,2013

Advice Goddess

Dark clouds on the verizon & SWAT about a Friday night?

by Amy Alkon
Q: I work 9 to 5, and my girlfriend of two years is retired and pretty much free all day. I've asked that we treat dinner as our special time to reconnect and ignore incoming phone calls. Sadly, instead of embracing this request, she has resisted me with full force.
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Wednesday, April 3,2013

Advice Goddess

When you wish upon a sleazebucket & a breath of fresh stare

by Amy Alkon
Q: I was seeing a guy for four months — a guy I liked better than I've ever liked anyone. Two months in, he was calling me his girlfriend, putting me on the phone with his mom, and saying that I shouldn't look to be dating other people. Yet, I noticed that he remained on the dating website we met on and was checking in there daily.
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Wednesday, March 27,2013

Advice Goddess

Will You Flash Mob Me?

by Amy Alkon
Q: I'm going to propose to my girlfriend, and it seems there's this trend of doing crazy, elaborate things to ask a girl to marry you. I know I can't compete with the guys like the New York City dude I just read about who threw down $45,000 to pop the question. But even if friends help me out for free, I don't know whether I can make my proposal cool enough to go viral like the Portland guy who had his choreographed and filmed.
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Wednesday, March 20,2013

Advice Goddess

Stammer time & speed mating

by Amy Alkon
Q: I can't talk to really pretty girls. If I'm talking to a girl I'm not that interested in or a dude, I'm golden. But if I'm attracted to a girl, my thoughts get totally scrambled. After a party, I walked this sweet, gorgeous girl to her car. She said some funny or cute thing about me, and I meant to say something witty back. Instead, I just said, "Huh." Somehow, it was all I had at that moment. It felt too awkward to keep standing there, so I just mumbled goodbye and walked to my car. Pathetic, huh?
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Wednesday, March 13,2013

Advice Goddess

The math to true love & overthinking of you

by Amy Alkon
Q: You need to tell men to never be the first to say those "three little words." A woman will tell you she's ready to hear them by telling you first. It seems the dating gurus agree: When a man says "I love you" first, he throws the attraction physics all off because he lowers his value in the woman’s subconscious.
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Wednesday, March 6,2013

Advice Goddess

Ex-rated movie & jest not that into you

by Amy Alkon
Q: I've been with my boyfriend for a year. We were best friends and talked about everything — what our kids would be like, projects we'd do together, magical worlds, and even other people we found attractive. Then, on his computer, I accidentally clicked on what I thought was just some porn video, but I recognized his blanket and realized it was he and his ex-girlfriend having sex (when they were dating).
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Tuesday, February 26,2013

Advice Goddess

Madame ovary & Bed, Bath, and Beyond disappointing

by Amy Alkon
Q: My wife needs a medical test that will involve her being naked in unflattering positions in front of another person, possibly male. I know she won't enjoy this and it certainly isn't sexual, but I want her to request a female gynecologist. She says she's embarrassed to do that, refuses to be controlled by me, and says having a male doctor doesn’t bother her. Well, it bothers me terribly.
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