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Wednesday, April 20,2011

Advice Goddess

by Amy Alkon
Q: I’ve been married for 10 years. I’m 43, well-educated, financially well-off, and fit. My husband and I are wonderful friends, and I love him dearly. However, for reasons he won’t tell me, he decided eight years ago that he was no longer interested in sex. He says it&rs...
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Wednesday, April 13,2011

Advice Goddess

This American strife & Love is bland

by Amy Alkon
Q: My boyfriend of 10 months asked me for my idea of a romantic evening, and I said I think it’s really romantic to make dinner together. He asked for specifics, and I ended up pretty much describing what my last boyfriend and I used to do: have wine and cheese, burn this particular incense I love, listen to “This American Life,” then make dinner together.
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Wednesday, April 6,2011

Advice Goddess

Too-big love & take a rein check

by Amy Alkon
Q: I’m an older woman (almost 50) in a six-year live-in relationship with a 25-year-old guy. The problem is he wants to sleep with other girls. I understand his need to be with other girls, especially at his age. Although I consented, I love him and cannot bear the thought of this.
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Wednesday, March 30,2011

Advice Goddess

Miffed connection & Leave actually

by Amy Alkon
Sometimes, the reason is that they are nervous and socially awkward and burp out the first thing they can that’s made of words.
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Wednesday, March 16,2011

Advice Goddess

’Can you hear me now?’ & Must love dogs in bed

by Amy Alkon
Q: I have an online dating issue. When a man and I are going to have our first phone chat, I set up a specific day and time so we don’t have to play phone tag. This allows me to schedule around it and be prepared and at my computer viewing his profile when we talk. I take the man’s number and call him, because I’m not comfortable giving out mine right away. During my several years of online dating, the percentage of guys who aren’t there at the planned time has been about 90. Many never contact me again, even to explain or apologize.—Feeling Very Stood Up
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Wednesday, February 23,2011

Advice Goddess

Ingrate Expectations and Say Cheesy

by Amy Alkon
Q: I fear my husband has some disability in regard to apologizing. Monday was his birthday. I had a terrible cold, but put myself on enough meds to cook him a wonderful meal and dessert. I felt too sick for sex, so I offered up a, um, very personal massage, but he refused. Later, when I asked for a hug as we got into bed, he said, “I don’t think so.” The next day, he was grumpy and distant. When I finally called him on it, he said he was sexually frustrated (despite the fact that we usually have sex three times a week). The following day, he acted like everything was normal, but I still wanted an apology. I said, “It’d be nice if you’d give me a hug and say, ‘I really appreciate everything you did and I’m sorry for being grumpy.’” He got mad and stormed out, which is typical. The closest he ever comes to apologizing is angrily blurting out that he’s sorry.—Still Waiting
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Wednesday, February 16,2011

Advice Goddess

Menopause in the Heterosexuality

by Amy Alkon
Q: I’m a 56-year-old married woman, and as far as I can tell, I’ve been happily heterosexual all my life — until recently. For the past year, I’ve been thinking about a woman until I can no longer think about anything else. I have such powerful and authentic sexual feelings that I feel compelled to reveal myself to her, but I think she’d probably knock me out.
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Wednesday, February 9,2011

Advice Goddess

Queasy credit & Queer and present danger

by Amy Alkon
Unfortunately, one man’s el-cheapo ski jacket is one woman’s quilted nylon warning sign. The way you see it, it’s not like you did a P. Diddy and splurged on some one-of-a-kind parka they had to kill 20 ostriches and a baby seal to make.
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Wednesday, February 2,2011

Advice Goddess

Speed hating & Blocked swan

by Amy Alkon
Your problem isn’t who you date but who you are: a girl who needs love way too much to be in a position to land any. You can really, really want love, and be really, really sick of putting a bowtie on your cat and pretending you’re on a date.
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Wednesday, January 26,2011

Advice Goddess

You make loving fund & One surprise fits all

by Amy Alkon
Four months into wedded bills, uh, bliss, you’re walking around muttering, “Aren’t a husband and wife supposed to support each other?” Well, yes, unless they start their marriage by making other arrangements. Absurdly, you agreed to the family values financial plan -- the husband takes care of all the expenses.
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