Header-lansing_1.jpg
 
Home » Articles »   By Amy Alkon
 
 
Wednesday, February 2,2011

Advice Goddess

Speed hating & Blocked swan

by Amy Alkon
Your problem isn’t who you date but who you are: a girl who needs love way too much to be in a position to land any. You can really, really want love, and be really, really sick of putting a bowtie on your cat and pretending you’re on a date.
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, January 26,2011

Advice Goddess

You make loving fund & One surprise fits all

by Amy Alkon
Four months into wedded bills, uh, bliss, you’re walking around muttering, “Aren’t a husband and wife supposed to support each other?” Well, yes, unless they start their marriage by making other arrangements. Absurdly, you agreed to the family values financial plan -- the husband takes care of all the expenses.
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, January 19,2011

Advice Goddess

Triumph of the Willy

by Amy Alkon
Q: When you gave advice to the woman complaining about her husband surfing the Internet for porn and swimsuit photos of Serena Williams,you seemed to have missed a word in her question. That word is “husband.” I doubt people get married with it being okay for another man or woman to be involved in their marriage. Pornography causes great harm to marriages. It’s not okay. It’s not normal. It’s a selfish and destructive choice.—Appalled Wife
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, January 12,2011

Advice Goddess

Extremely old spice & Getting to null her better

by Amy Alkon
Where you went wrong is in not shutting the guy down right away. You don’t make a date with a guy to tell him you don’t want to date him. You especially don’t when the guy starts hitting on you at defcon “Let’s play Doctor Zhivago!” Chances are, you didn’t respond as you did because you’re some naive bunny, but because you’re a woman.
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, January 5,2011

Advice Goddess

Home is where the fart is & Love has come to sty

by Amy Alkon
Q: My wife of eight years is a really good person but always needs reassurance that she’s attractive. I’m finding that difficult because, on a typical night, she takes a dump in our master bathroom with the door open, saunters over to our bed with a few open sores on her face from picking her zits, rips a fart, and comes at me for a kiss. I give her a peck and dive under the covers so she won’t think I’m interested in sex. She then feels rejected and unloved. When I point out specific things that turn me off, she’s offended. She apparently expects me to be supernaturally attracted to her despite her actions (always wearing nasty sweatpants, hair in shambles, etc.). I don’t expect her to dress up, just to try to look a little cute. If only she’d see herself as a beautiful, seductive, confident woman, and act like it — instead of acting like her girlfriends, who brag that they’ve “trained” their husbands to accept their burping, farting, etc. Am I completely ignorant about true love?—Troubled But Committed
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, December 29,2010

Advice Goddess

'I’ll have the scrimp cocktail!'

by Amy Alkon
When we were ordering, he suggested we play “a fun game,” which entailed closing our eyes and picking a number (the entrees were numbered). I said okay, then he said I couldn’t pick numbers between 20 and 25 because those entrees were expensive. Completely disenchanted, I opened my eyes and chose something cheap.
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, December 22,2010

Advice Goddess

An unfair to remember & Bland of brothers

by Amy Alkon
Q: In middle school, I got a crush on “Sam,” but he wasn’t interested. In high school, he took me to prom, but only as friends when none of the other girls he asked said yes. I was jealous upon hearing he’d gotten married, but several years later, he called, said he was divorcing, was coming to town, and wanted to see me. I gave him a fine homecoming, thinking he was finally seeing me in a new light. At week’s end, I said I wanted to be more than friends, but he didn’t. Apparently, he was just doing the girl he didn’t in high school.
Read more   Read it in print
Wednesday, December 15,2010

Advice Goddess

Dirty-Something

by Amy Alkon
Q: My husband surfs the Internet for porn and pictures of women when he’s bored. I want to accept this, but I can’t help but feel insecure and betrayed. He doesn’t watch porn when I’m home, but if I were gone more often, I think he’d be hopping online. I don’t snoop; I just see clues. Yesterday, I returned from a quick errand, and he’d left up a search for “Serena Williams swimsuit photos.” Pretty harmless, but it still stabbed me in the heart! He’s a deeply caring and sensitive man, and has been willing talk to me about this. He suggested I look at pics of men or porn, and said he wouldn’t feel threatened, just happy if I’m feeling good. It still drives me nuts and makes me less sexually giving to know that when I leave my house he’s fantasizing about other women.—Trying
Read more
Wednesday, December 8,2010

Advice Goddess

You tech my breath away & Deleting him on

by Amy Alkon
Q: I’ve had some good experiences with online dating, but I just can’t get over this feeling that it just isn’t natural or sexy.—Clicking For Love
Read more
Wednesday, December 1,2010

Advice Goddess

The boors and the bees

by Amy Alkon
Q: In your response to the woman with the publicly gropey boyfriend, you deemed French kissing at a workplace event inappropriate PDA. How about French kissing one's girlfriend during a performance of “Stomp” (musical theater)? The woman behind me that evening gave me negative feedback…which was of no interest to me. My take on people put off by PDA (isn't it really only women?) is that their disgust is based more in envy than superior decorum. Someone reacting negatively to seeing my tongue go into my girlfriend’s mouth is suffering at their own doing — because of how they process their witnessing of my actions. (I’d love to hear their reaction to my having sex in a movie theater. Come on, we were in the back row, and the seven people there would've had to turn their heads 180 degrees to see anything.) Basically, I own my actions and I’m fine with them. Others need to start owning their reactions, and you need to stop promoting arbitrary standards of behavior.—My Two Cents
Read more
 
 
 
 
 
Search Archive
Search Archive:
 
 

© 2014 City Pulse

City Pulse. 2001 E. Michigan Ave. Lansing, MI 48912.
Phone: (517)371-5600. Fax: (517) 999-6066.
E-mail: publisher@lansingcitypulse.com

 
Close